Fathers

Fathers are essential. I have known and felt the results of this throughout my whole life. To support my own ideas, I did some reading, and the article “The Importance of a Father in a Child’s life” supported many of the ideas that I have felt and seen. Fathers are essential for the emotional development of their children, setting the bar for relationships with others, for their daughters, and their sons.

An involved father promotes inner growth and strength. When fathers are involved in their children's lives in an affectionate and supportive way, it increases the child's cognitive and social development. Fathers should also bring security, both physical and emotional.

Good fathers are essential to show their children what good healthy relationships should look like. Children base relationships off of what their relationship with their father is, or how their father treats their mother, their siblings, and themselves. When they have a healthy relationship, then they are able to build those relationships within their own lives. Then, the ripple effect can occur. Each of the children influenced by a good father, will be able to create those relationships within their own homes, which will then travel down through generations. 

Daughters need a good, involved father. When fathers are loving and gentle, then the daughter will look for those qualities in the men she dates (and the man she will eventually marry). So basically, daughters will typically find the men who exemplify the characteristics of her father. As a daughter, I have definitely looked for those characteristics my father exemplified. I haven’t realized that until now, but I have been looking for someone who is like my dad. I have been looking for someone who will love and put God first in our relationship, someone who loves people for who they are and has empathy and is good at listening. I’ve looked for someone who works hard and loves me for who I am, and is goofy, and can see me at my worst, and bring me to my best. I’ve looked for someone who brings me peace and helps me feel safe. And thankfully I’ve been able to find that person. 

Similarly, sons need a good father. Sons typically base themselves off of their father’s character. They will imitate the behaviors of their fathers, and if those behaviors are good, then they will emulate and become like their father. Likewise, if there is not a good father, then the negative qualities can be exemplified as well. If there isn’t a father in the home, then the sons will look elsewhere for male role models to emulate. 

My father was present in my life. I had a positive experience with my dad. He was often busy with work, but he would find time to spend with me. I remember clearly when he stopped working on something because he saw me trying to learn how to ride my bike. He took the little free time he had to help me learn. This was a very common theme. He would prioritize my family even with his crazy work and church schedules. He set the bar high for whoever my future spouse would be.

As a woman, it is my role to find a man that will be the best father to my future family. Thankfully, I had a wonderful father who cared about my family, and had a huge heart. Like I mentioned above, I have been able to find the man that I will be building my family with. He is so kind, empathetic, spiritual, honest, hardworking, and so much more. He is just so good. I am so grateful that I have been able to find “one of the good ones”.